[ULASAN BUKU / BOOK REVIEW] Harry Potter And The Cursed Child, 9 Tahun Penantian Berujung Kekecewaan :(

Setelah menunggu 9 tahun akhirnya saya bisa baca lanjutan dari novel favorit saya "HARRY POTTER" saya masih inget ketika Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows rilis waktu itu saya masih kelas 2 SMP, pada 2015 sequel dari my beloved book pun dirilis dalam bentuk pertunjukkan teater di West End London, dan akhirnya di tahun 2016 ini naskah pertunjukan tersebut pun ditulis dalam bentuk buku!  Jadi bisa dibayangkan lah rasanya kaya apa? saya nunggu dari kelas 2 SMP sampai sekarang saya sudah menghitung hari menuju sidang skripsi.  Well biarpun secara teknis ini bukan murni karya JK Rowling, Rowling hanya terlibat “membimbing” pembuatan cerita dan naskah pertunjukkanya diserahkan penuh Jack Thorne, untuk penulis bukunya sendiri Jack Thorne bekerja sama dengan John Tiffany, biarpun bukan cerita "ori" dari Rowling tapi sudah menjadi kewajiban buat saya harus baca bukunya (karena saya gak mungkin pergi ke London buat nonton pertunjukkannya) anyhoo ini pendapat dan review saya 

[SPOILER ALERT!]

Jadi buku ini dibagi dalam 2 bagian dalam satu buku part 1 dan 2 (sama dengan pertujukan teaternya act 1 & act 2) Pas saya baca bukunya jujur otak saya terlalu banyak ngomong "bentar, bentar, bentar, huh?" kenapa? well karena di buku ini banyak banget ketidak konsistenan dari carita original yang pernah dibuat JK Rowling selain ketidak konsistenan buku ini juga banyak mengaharidkan twist yang terkesan aneh dan ala-ala fanfiction, saya jadi berpikir kok bisa ya JK Rowling membiarkan Jack Thorne (penulis naskah pertunjukan sekaligus bukunya) merusak masterpiece karyanya dan menyetujui cerita ini dijadikan buku?  dari beberapa hal tersebut beberapa hal ini yang menurut saya paling parah. 

1.    Pertama (& yang paling krusial) masalah time turner, oke kita semua tau di buku ketiga JK Rowling membuat "kecerobohan" dengan menghadirkan time turner, karena dengan time turner kita bisa balik ke masa lalu jadi kenapa time turner tersebut gak dipakai buat mencegah Tom Riddle sebelum semuanya terlambat dan menyadari hal tersebut JK Rowling pun memutuskan untuk  menhapus segala bentuk cerita yang berbau perjalanan waktu dan memutuskan bahwa alur waktu Harry Potter akan dibuat natural maju dengan menghancurkan time turner pada pertarungan di kementrian sihir (buku ke 5).  Saya gak tau apa yang ada di dalam otaknya  Jack Thorne sampai akhirnya mereka sepakat memutuskan "Let's bring back the bloody time turner!" jadi dalam buku ini time turner kembali "beraksi" bahkan menjadi pokok penting dalam cerita & you know what? yang nyimpen time turner itu ternyata Harry Potter! di tahun 2020 Amos Diggory menemui Harry Potter & meminta time turner untuk menyelamatkan anaknya (Cedric) dari Tiwizard Turnament tapi Harry menolak dan akhirnya time turner ini dipakai diam-diam oleh anaknya Albus Potter & teman dekatnya Scorpius Malfoy untuk kembali ke tahun di mana Cedric Diggory dibunuh Voldemort.  Albus melakukan hal ini karena dirinya ingin membuktikan kepada ayahnya kalau dia bisa keluar dari bayang2 ayahnya yang you know lah ya dia "the choosen one”, pada akhirnya time turner itu pun kembali di hancurkan but guess what? Ternyata bukan cuma satu tapi masih ada 5 prototype time turner yang lain (seriously WTF?).

2.     Say Hello to Scorpibus (?) the Drarry 2.0.  Okay kebanyakan dari Harry Potter fans pasti tau nickname “Drarry” dong? yup! Nickname yang diberikan oleh para Potterhead untuk Draco & Harry mungkin ada jutaan fan fiction yang menceritakan Drarry bertebaran di internet, tapi sayangnya dalam cerita Harry Potter yang dibuat JK Rowling hal itu mustahil terjadi karena, pertama, Harry dan Draco merupakan rival dalam buku 1-7 kedua, baik Draco maupun Harry keduanya bukan lah seorang gay so the Drarry thing just exist in fan fiction world.  Dan lagi… saya gagal paham apa yang ada di pikiran Jack Thorne pada saat itu, mungkin ini yang mereka pikirkan saat menulis naskah The Cursed Child: “Okay we all agreed that Draco and Harry will make a hell’a power couple but they can’t be together so how about we make their sons date each other but not exactly dating we're gonna just teasing the readers”.  Secara teknis Scorpius Malfoy & Albus Potter bukan (belum menjadi) sepasang kekasih, tapi kedekatan kedua bocah tersebut mengindikasikan kalau ada yang spesial di antara mereka (because there's no bromancr like that seriously) ya mirip-mirip Hermione & Ron di awal-awal lah, pada saat Albus menggunakan time turner untuk kembali ke tahun di mana Cedric dibunuh Scorpius berjanji kalau dia akan selalu berada di sisi Albus di manapun dan kapanpun.  Homosexualitas bukan lah hal baru di dalam dunia sihir JK Rowling seperti yang kita ketahui kalau Prof. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, O.M., X.J.(Sorc.) S. Mag.Q. merupakan seorang gay, yang menjadi masalah saya di sini adalah hal ini membuat ceritanya mirip dengan cerita fan fiction ala-ala Drarry, seolah-olah karena para Potterhead “gagal menjodohkan” Harry & Draco membuat kedua penulis tersebut “mengabulkan” harapan para Potterhead yang memuja hal tersebut dan mewariskannya pada anak mereka.  Selain kedekatan mereka berdua masalah lainnya juga muncul ketika shorting hat menyeleksi Albus ke Slytherin tanpa adanya "kompromi" padahal dalam cerita yang dibuat oleh JK Rowling semua anak dapat memilih asrama pilihannya dan sorting hat akan mempertimbangkannya seperti apa yang dijelaskan Harry pada Albus pada epilog buku ke 7

3.     Delphini (Riddle-Lestrange) Diggory.  Okay kalau menurut kalian kedua hal di atas terkesan aneh tunggu sampai kalian baca ini.  Bellatrix Lestrange & Lord Voldemort punya anak! Yup! Yup! Yup! Helo!!! Kejutaaann!!! Jadi sebelum perang sihir tahun 1998 di Hogwarts Bella melahirkan seorang anak perempuan secara diam-diam di rumah Malfoy (Malfoy Manor) dari hasil perselingkuhannya dengan bosnya sendiri Tom Riddle a.k.a Lord Voldemort oh poor Rodolphus his wife cheated on him with his own boss :(. Dalam Harry Potter And The Cursed Child Delphi merupakan tokoh antagonis utama dan ketika identitanya terbuka barulah kita tahu kalau yang dimaksud dalam judul buku ini adalah dirinya (Delphini) Delhpi tinggal bersama Amos Diggory (dibawah mantera Confundus) menyamar sebagi keponakannya.  Seperti kedua hal yang sudah saya jelaskan sebelumnya lagi-lagi Thorne & Tiffany selalu punya cara buat menghancurkan cerita yang dengan susah payah dibuat oleh JK Rowling, bukan hanya kehadirannya dalam cerita saja yang “aneh” tapi alur waktu saat Bella mengandung dan melahirkannya pun akan terkesan aneh, tidak dijelaskan kapan tepatnya Delphi lahir tapi dari kemungkinan yang ada pada saat trio Harry mendatangi rumah Malfoy sebelum perang sihir untuk menyelamatkan Luna & Olivander tidak ada tanda-tanda kalau Bella sedang hamil (ya tentu karena pada saat itu Rowling tidak membuat ceritanya demikian) jadi bisa diasumsikan kalau Bella sudah melahirkan anaknya pada saat itu itu artinya kehamilan Bella diperkirakan berlangsung pada pertengahan sampai akhir tahun 90’an (sebelum 1998).  And again cerita ini sangat dipaksakan oleh kedua penulisnya tersebut, kita tahu bahwa sumber kejahatan utama dalam dunia Harry Potter berasal dari Salazar Slytherin tapi sejak kematian Tom Riddle / Lord Voldemort yang merupakan keturunan dari Salazar pada tahun 1998 membuat warisan keturunan itu pun terputus dan hal itu yang mungkin membuat kedua penulis tersebut menghadirkan sosok Delphina sebagai tokoh antagonis utama dalam karyanya, tapi seperti yang sudah saya katakana hal ini terlalu dipaksakan.

Bottom line: It was a big dissappointment for me karena cerita yang dihadirkan tidak berbeda dengan fan fiction yang banyak ditulis sama anak remaja dengan twist yang "aneh" dan dibumbui cerita romance ala-ala standar fanfic remaja bedanya cuma dengan penulisan yang lebih bagus jadi bisa saya katakan kalau Harry Potter And The Cursed Child is basically Well-Crafted Fan Fiction. But don't get me wrong i still love the magical world that JK Rowling has created for all of Harry Potter fans (including me) dan ulasan ini cuma pendapat dari saya yang subjektif dan spesifik pada buku bukan pada pertunjukan teater, saya belum pernah menyaksikan pertunjukkan teaternya dan mungkin pertunjukan teaternya tidak seburuk bukunya (mungkin loh ya).

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Posted in: books,Opini,review,Terserah Penulis

Is Masturbation Normal? (Masturbation Myths)

For the love of God masturbation is a normal, natural, and healthy physical activity but unfortunately some of us still put a religion and social stigma associated with it, and this stigma drive us to some myths about masturbation.  So I think I'd like to talk about it now and reviled some facts about masturbation.  I know this is probably the most different topic that I've wrote on this blog, I never post any blog post about sex and I think I should start it now because why not? Just because some of you still think that masturbation is taboo to be discussed it doesn't mean you don't do it right? (*wink wink*).

Most of my friends won't talk about masturbation because they think it isn't a normal topic to be brought up and also it has something to do with the stigma that makes masturbation is a shame like "God hates masturbation" or "if you masturbate it means you're desperately single and you need a GF/BF but you don't have one so you use your hand instead" and bla bla bla and also some of you are maybe seriously stressed out because your fear of the physical damage that might caused by self personal pleasure.  What if I told you that masturbation is been around from the beginning of time like ever since the earth still a pangaea or when the first cave man walking around the earth they were pleasuring themselves, and now the problem is (if you consider it as a problem) the society and religion put some stigmas associated with shame of mastirbation, but the truth is masturbation is a normal, natural thing that you don't have to be ashamed of.  And here are the common myths about self pleasure a.k.a masturbation :

Myth #1 Masturbation caused blindness / losing your eye sight.  This is probably the most common myth about masturbation and this is a total bullshit! Because if it's true I must be blind long time ago and yes my eye sight is not that good but it has nothing to do with it, like no scientists has ever published a research about it, i mean come on why the hell spend their money and time to do a research about total bullshit and FYI this myth started back in the day when sex is just meant for procreation there wasn't any funny business because sex felt great they need to have sex just in order to reproduction and anything else outside of that was viewed bad and they needed to find a way to scare people so they don't do any sexual activity outside of that, and blindness is pretty scary so there you go the myth about masturbation caused blindness just started.

Myth #2 masturbation can causes erectile dysfunction, you can't have a boner.  Some people still believe that if you masturbate a lot you'll ended up with erectile dysfunction yet they still do it ;) and i can say that is 100% just another huge horseshit! Again guys there are no scientific research says that masturbation cause erectile dysfunction.

Myth #3 of you're in a relationship you don't need to masturbate, while the truth is many people are still masturbating regardless of their relationship status, the deal is some people think that if you're in a relationship and you do masturbate it means you're cheating on your partner, like if you have her/him why the hell do you need to do that and the truth is people has different and varying degrees of sexual drive and pleasure and if you need a time to get some self pleasure is okay it's normal don't sweat it and if you find your significant other masturbating don't get jealous because sometimes you need to take care of yourself.

Myth #4 women don't maaturbate.  FALSE!!! The truth ia 62% of women regardless of their relationship status are masturbating

Myth #5 there's no health benefits of masturbation, and again guys the answer is absolutely false.  There are plenty of benefits you'll get associated with masturbation like relaxation, less stress, it helps you get a better sleep and I've read a article says that masturbation can helps you get a healthier prostate (if you don't use it you're lose it right?) So yeaahhh go for it guys your prostate will thank you!

And the last one, it is actually more like a question than a myth. "Am i masrurbating too much? How much is too much? Can you masturbating too much?" this is probably the most asked question about masrurbation and the answer is it depends on you, i mean there's no too much for you to masturbate unless there's very small percentage group of people that does actually masturbate too much, so how do you know if it's too much? Well first of all you might be  notice if it's too much like when you feel like you're hurting yourself, your penis is too sore then let  him get some rest don't hurt yourself.  You can masturbate all day long like three or five times a day if it's okay to you then go for it but once that masturbation is actually interferes with you performing social and daily activities, like going to work, going to school, hang out with friends then yes indeed it can turns into too much but if it's not caused the problem then sure you can masturbate whenever you want just make sure while you taking care of your business you do it in your personal area.

Alright guys the reason i made this post is because there are people that concern about this issue and i know there are still some stigmas about masturbation and stuff, I just wanted to let you know that masturbation is 100% natural thing that you shouldn't be ashamed of and avoid to talk about it, spoiler alert almost all of the people are masturbating your Dad, your Grandpa, your brother, your roommate and others like everybody does it! Even (sorry) your Mom! 

I hope this post can straighten your views on masturbation, see ya!

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Posted in: iNfo,Terserah Penulis

Nuhan's Guide To Life #1 - How To Survive First College Year

a typical college freshman guy :p

Hey Y’all I’m back here with some of my piece of advice about how to survive Freshman year of university life this some of advices are for you guys who are incoming college freshman.  College is a beautiful time of your life (trust me!) you might think that high school were the happiest time of your life but uh-uh no! but college is! Why? Because college (especially freshman year) is the place where your parents and the society thinks that you’re a “semi passable adult who have a full responsibility about yourself” but the fact that you’re just some kinda “advanced version of foolish teenagers who can legally drink alcohol and have sex while your parents are paying for your life and college tuition”, how beautiful is that?! I’m I right? :D (nah I’m just kidding).  But freshman year of college is also can be a huge disaster for you if you don’t know how to survive it but don’t worry guys I’m here to give you some of my advices.

Tip #1 it’s just like high school

The first thing that pops up from your head when you hear the word “high school” is probably friendship, and yes it goes the same way in college, make sure to make friends while you’re at campus, I know it may sounds silly and ridiculous, and I know that you’re thinking to yourself like “of course I’m gonna make a friend, duh!”  but I mean please make sure that you’re actually going out there and meeting new people go out there and get involved in a student activities meet people at your classes, you’re being thrown into this world where you don’t know any body around you and it’s going to be super fucking uncomfortable for a lot of you to make friends out there, so please just make sure that you’re meeting people talking to them and make sure that they know that you are a relatively normal person.

Tip #2 make sure that you feel at home

Another tip for you is that I find a lot of people don’t really take advantage of when they’re at college is redecorating your room, I’m not just talking about Pinterest DIY tutorial bullshit I’m talking about just making your room and your living space your own whether you’re living in a dorm or boarding house or apartment just make sure that you’re feel at home, you don’t have to make your room look like super 5 star hotel looking environment but make sure your room is an extension of your personality because you’re gonna live there until next year (9 months) or maybe more than that so you wanted to chill out homie and as welcoming to both yourself and your roommate and your potential new friend.

Tip #3 EAT!

Don’t forget to have snacks in your room it’s essential because the food court is not always going to be open when you’re hungry at midnight and there’s going to be some times when you’re up late night studying and you need some food to fuel your energy and you don’t want to walk to buy some food so just make sure you always have something in your system, make sure you’re constantly eating, I know that stress can get to a lot, and you forget the basic simple task like eating or even breathe and shower, but please for the sake of God don’t forget to eat.

Tip #4 Be honest

Another piece of advice it’s gonna be very important for those are going to college for the first time is please be honest to those around you, don’t make up stories about self don’t embellish the truth about things that you have done in the past, just be who you are.  If people are going to like you and be friend with you, they’re wanna be going with person that you genuinely are, not the person that you want to be. 

Tip #5 Call ya Mommy and Daddy

Also for a lot of you who are leaving home for the very first time and actually living on your own, don’t be afraid to call your mommy and daddy at home.  College is one big transition from awkward dumb teenage years into semi passable adult (just like I said in the beginning) so these 4 years are the time of your life when you can really own up to the fact that you have no idea what the fuck you’re doing (sorry to say that but it’s kinda true) if you need advice, if you need a guidance just call them, call your mommy and daddy, they want to see you succeed just as much as you want to see yourself succeed so please don’t be afraid to be upfront with them, give them call every now and then and remind them that you love them.  Also for a lot of you your parents are gonna be the reason that you’re going to college at the first place, possibly paying part or all of your tuition and life, so be sure to THANK THEM!

Tip #6 Go to class

Don’t forget the college is about your education and you’re parents are paying for absurd amount of money for the tuition, don’t skip classes, don’t skimp on the studying and please give your all.  I would imagine that the reason that you’re away at college right now is to learn, so please make sure you’re doing that, don’t think you’re too cool for school, these aren’t high school anymore! People here actually want to learn and if you aren’t giving it your all when it comes to your classes, why are you paying for those absurd amount of money to go away to college?!?!

The last tip Be yourself

And finally the most important thing is be yourself, I know it’s sounds cliché or some of you might find it hard to do it because some of you might don’t know who you are yet, but it’s time to find out who you are, find out what you like, find out what classes you’re interested in, just explore it this is the time where you find out who you truly are.

Okay that’s it from me guys I hope it helps you and don’t forget to share it with your friends it might helps them too, bye ;)

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Posted in: Nuhan's Guide

[Masak] Resep Pesmol Ikan Patin

Blogosphere tau ikan pesmol kan? Pesmol itu makanan khas Sunda, biasanya sih terbuat dari ikan mas tapi kali ini saya mau membuat kreasi Pesmol dari ikan patin, yuk simak.

Waktu

• Persiapan 15 menit masak 35 menit =  50 Menit

Tingkat kesulitan

• 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

Bahan

• 1/2 kg Ikan patin, bersihkan dan bagi dua
• 1 buah Jeruk nipis
• 12 Buah cabe rawit
• 1 Batang daun bawang, potong tipis-tipis
• 3 cm Jahe geprek
• 3 cm Lengkoas geprek
• 2 lembar Daun salam
• 2 buah Tomat, potong masing-masing empat bagian
• 2 sdm Cuka masak (atau sesuai selera)
• Daun kemangi (secukupnya untuk garnish)
• Daun cilantro (secukupnya untuk garnish)
• 300 ml air
• 3 sdm minyak goreng untuk menumis
• Garam, Gula, & Kaldu bubuk secukupnya

Bumbu halus

• 5 siung Bawang putih
• 3 siung Bawang merah
• 5 butir Kemiri sangrai
• 2 cm Kunyit
• 1 sdt Merica putih

Bumbu marinasi ikan

• 2 cm Jahe
• 2 cm Kunyit
• Garam secukupnya

Mari masak!

1. Haluskan bumbu marinasi.
2. Ikan yang telah dibersihkan lumuri ikan dengan jeruk nipis diamkan sebentar lalu cuci bersih kembali.
3. Lumuri dengan bumbu marinasi yang sudah dihaluskan, istirahatkan.
4. Selagi menunggu marinasi meresap haluskan semua bumbu halus.
5. Goreng ikan yang telah dimarinasi hingga matang (berwarna cokelat keemasan) kemudian tiriskan.
6. Tumis bumbu halus, jahe, lengkoas, dan daun salam sampai tercium harum.
7. Tambahkan air, tunggu sampai mendidih kemudian masukkan cabe rawit, daun bawang dan tomat.
8. Tambahkan garam, gula, kaldu bubuk dan cuka, aduk sebentar, angkat.
9. Siramkan di atas ikan goreng yang sudah ditata di piring.
10. Sajikan.

Selamat mencoba ^_^

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Posted in: Masak

[Masak] Tongseng Jamur Merang

Langsung aja ya Blogosphere disimak resepnya :)

Waktu

• Persiapan 10 menit masak 20 menit = 30 Menit

Tingkat kesulitan

• 1  2  3  4  5  6,5  7  8  9  10

Bahan

• 200 gr Jamur merang, potong melintang
• 7 Buah cabe rawit
• 1/4 buah Kol
• 3 cm Jahe geprek
• 3 cm Lengkoas geprek
• 2 buah Tomat, potong masing-masing empat bagian
• 3 lembar Daun jeruk
• 200 ml (1 gelas) Santan kental
• 1 sdm kecap manis
• 3 sdm minyak goreng untuk menumis
• Garam, Merica bubuk, & Kaldu bubuk secukupnya

Bumbu halus

• 3 siung Bawang putih
• 3 siung Bawang merah
• 1 sdm Gula merah
• 3 cm Kunyit

Mari masak!

1. Haluskan bumbu halus.
2. Panaskan minyak goreng dan masukkan bumbu yang sudah dihaluskan.
3. Setelah tercium harum masukkan daun jeruk, jahe dan lengkoas.
4. Aduk sebentar dam masukkan kol dan jamur.
5. Tambahkan santan, aduk sebentar dan biarkan sampai santan menyusut.
6. Tambahkan kecap, garam, merica bubuk dan kaldu bubuk, aduk rata.
7. Masukkan tomat dan cabe rawit, aduk lagi sebentar.
8. Sajikan (lebih enak kalau ditaburi bawang merah goreng).

Selamat mencoba ^_^

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Posted in: Masak

Apathy is our biggest flaw

What is your flaw? That question is "wow" i mean that's really hard question and i'm not saying that i'm a flawless person, i do have a flaw (we all have a flaw) but i think my biggest flaw is my apathy. sometimes i feel completely lack of emotion or motivation about something.

My apathy tends to sneak up on me, and it's really easy to get apathetic about something.  i find when i'm engaged and when i have a positive energy like "oh yeah i'm ready to go, i'm an awesome person" but i think the only thing that takes me down severely when i get apathetic, apathy is more dangerous than hate, why? because hate force to move forward at least in its prone to change (ya know it's not actually that different sometimes for love) it means that you care, and apathy is the exact opposite of that.  when you get locked into that you can lose yourself it's the most self-defeating quality i think there is for a human to have.  For me apathy usually comes when i'm not happy with how or what i'm doing something if i'm like "wow i really really suck at this" and i get really apathetic about it like it doesn't matter anyway just pfftt... and even it does matter even if it could matter because i feel bad about myself i let it go and long the same line it's also when i feed my addiction to the virtual world like social media, video games or just chilling out from the real world for too long, i mean everyone is got escape right now like everyone is gotta like watching video on YouTube, or playing video game or bolt your eyes on instagram you know something that helps you escaping from real world,

But when you do it too much you can lose yourself, you will lose your sense of reality and then it becomes a lot easier to just not care about anything at all.  I think a lot of time we enjoy ourselves more in the virtual world because we don't have to pay attention to what our lives are in reality and the virtual world is like easier to improve and it's easier to return like if you not care about to play something goes wrong in the virtual world you just like "pfftt... whatever" you can just move on to another virtual world and it's a lot easier than in real world, you just get one try you getting deal with all this thing that happened, and you have face up to it you can't ignore it and i think for me and for a lot of people it is when you ignore the problem then you grow apathetic about your own life, that's when we are not being "very good people" i guess...

And i think apathy is our biggest flaw, growing up in the age where the virtual world take over everything (like literally) it's hard to not being apathy and it's sad, i try to be more care about anything happened around me but still tho, if something goes out of my control it's easier to choose to be apathetic. it's sounds really really bad but that's the fact i am very sure that is not just my problem, you probably have the same problem as me.  i'm not sure how to fix this flaw but i think we all have to try to be more sympathy (i guess) i know it's hard but it still possible to us to be "not apathetic".

Okay guys i hope you enjoyed reading my short blog, my blogging schedule is really messed-up but i still love to post something in this blog. bye...

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Posted in: Terserah Penulis

2014 Pop and Web Culture In A Nutshell

2014 it's almost over in less than 48 hours, and for better or worse 2015 is right around the corner. So i'm going to make a short review about Pop and Web Culture trends in 2014, we had some good and memorable things but also we had some uber weird and obnoxious trends in 2014.

1. Frozen Madness
We had this Frozen, that Frozen, those Frozen, these Frozen, Frozen themes everywhere!! Don't get me wrong i love Disney movie, and Frozen was an excellent one, but seriously guys... it's time to let it go! literally let it fucking go!

2. Turn down for what?
"Turn Down for What" is a EDM by DJ Snake and Lil Jon released on December 2013 and the music video came in March 2014.  But in pop culture it's a rhetorical question used by teenagers, if "turn up" means the act of getting drunk and high and being reckless so "turn down" would mean "sobering up" then "turn down for what?" means "sobering up for what?".

3. Sharknado
The first Sharknado was okay. The second Sharknado was absurd and undoubtedly any other movies that have Sharknado in the title will be downright obnoxious.

4. Bae & Yasss
Bæ/bae is a Danish word for shit. Also used by people on the internet who think it means Before Anyone Else or another way to say babe or baby, so if you call your BF/GF bae it means you call them shit. And "Yass" A word used out of excitement of a situation. Becomes natural after a while. A more vibrant form of yes.

5. Celebrities drama
There was Solange, Beyonce and Jay Z and every time that Selena Gomez unfriended anyone of her famous friends and most recently the ongoing feud between Azealia Banks and Iggy Azalea. These are prime examples of celebrity drama that should be kept behind closed doors and does not need to be broadcast over the Internet.

6. Chia or Kale?
Kale and chia was all the rage this past year, but it’s time for everyone to put down the vegetable and try some new leafy greens and other weird seeds.

7. Kardashians
‘Keeping Up With The Kardashians” was so last year. Ever since Bruce and Kris called it quits, Kylie and Kendall grew up and Kourtney had yet another baby we just can’t seem to care about what the Kardashians are up to.

8. Stupid People gone viral
Alex from target, Donna Goudeau Pimp Squad and a lot more.

9. Hashtags
It seems like everywhere you turn there’s a hashtag. Every TV show has one, Facebook has tried to incorporate them into their platform, they appear on clothing and as home decor. Please stop abusing the hashtag.

10. Old Movie Reboot
Why does Hollywood feel the need to remake classics like “Annie,” “Godzilla” and “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”? They rarely do as well as the originals.

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Posted in: Terserah Penulis

Saya nggak ngerti sama jenis pasangan ini... (pasangan yang aneh)

Seaneh-anehnya pasangan ini, masih lebih aneh pasangan yang ada di bawah.

Sush....sush....sush.... sebelum kalian tanya, mending saya jawab duluan, ya saya jomblo! puas? oke tapi sejomblo-jomblonya saya saya masih bersyukur karena ada loh orang yang udah punya "pasangan" tapi statusnya itu nggak jelas dan super ambigu, maksud saya apa coba namanya pergi bedua, makan berdua, tidur berdua, boker berdua pokoknya kemana-mana selalu berdua ya pokoknya mereka kayak orang pacaran, tapi judulnya nggak pacaran. Gitu deh pokoknya, kalo ditanya "elu bedua pacaran?" for the love god mereka diam seribu bahasa. Entah karena punya masalah dengan komitmen atau ada alasan pribadi lainnya, banyak orang yang lebih memilih untuk enggak meresmikan status hubungannya, maksudnya pacaran gitu. Manusia itu emang makhluk yang unik dan banyak macemnya. Kadang mereka lebih memilih sesuatu yang aneh dan nggak umum karena alesan-alesan tertentu. Kita bahas satu persatu ya status-status ambigu tersebut.



#1 Te'Te'Em
Sejak dipopulerkan oleh duo vokal Ratu, istilah ini jadi cukup beken. Hubungan TTM ini kira-kira begini. Jadi kamu punya teman, teman sepermainan, dimana dia ada kamu juga ada disitu. Temen kamu ini manis, baik hati dan selalu ada ketika kamu butuh bantuan. Tapi suatu hari, kamu jadi bingung, soalnya dia bilang dia cinta sama kamu dan mau kamu jadi kekasihnya dia.
Nah sebenernya hubungan ini semuanya salah kamu. Kamu kan cuma temenan sama dia, terus ngapain kamu mesra-mesraan sama dia? Geer kan jadinya? Serba salah deh sekarang. Kalo kamu terima, nanti semuanya bakal jadi beda. Kamu nggak bisa ngejar layangan lagi sama dia. Pasti kamu disuruh nunggu di lapangan aja, karena dia khawatir kalo kamu ikut ngejar layangan nanti ditabrak mobil. Terus kalo kamu ajak dia main bola, nanti dia bakal pelan-pelan mainnya, ngebiarin kamu menang biar kamu seneng. Ih ngga asik kan.


#2 Ha'Te'Es
Oke sebelumnya saya cuma pengen tau siapa sih yang mencetuskan istilah "hubungan tanpa status" maksudnya apa coba? mereka berhubungan tapi nggak ada statusnya jadi apa? Ini sebenernya adalah sebuah paradoks, seperti lagu-lagu yang judulnya "Untitled". Hubungan HTS itu kan begini, kamu sama si dia deket, sering pergi berdua, ngomongnya aku-kamu, cerita-cerita hal yang personal dan intim, saling mencintai dan menyayangi, dan suka ehem-ehem juga dalam banyak kasus. Nggak ada bedanya sama orang pacaran kan? Tapi pas orang nanya "eh itu pacar lo?" kamu bakal jawab "Enggak, cuma HTS-an aja kok"


#3 Kakak Adek
Sebetulnya hubungan seperti ini janggal. Masa kamu pacaran sama orang yang kamu anggep sebagai kakak/adek kamu sendiri? Coba deh, kamu kalo sama kakak/adek kamu ngapain? Berantem kan? Minjem barang sama duit, sama saling mengadukan ke papa mama kalo ada yang abis berbuat kesalahan. Terus sekarang coba kamu bayangin, kamu sayang-sayangan sama kakak/adek kamu. Nanyain dia udah makan apa belum dengan mesra, ngucapin selamat pagi selamat malam dengan manis. Terus kamu nonton tv sama dia sambil sender-senderan, peluk-pelukan... Terus ternyata nggak ada orang dirumah.. Kamu sama kakak/adek kamu liat-liatan... Jantung berdetak kencang.. Muka bergerak saling mendekat... Terus... Eh yakin kamu mau kayak gini sama kakak/adek kamu? Sarap!.


#4 Cemceman
Hahaha istilah yang mungkin bagi sebagian orang terdengar sangat jadul, nah buat yang belum tau apa itu cemceman jadi sebenernya cemceman itu mirip sama HTS tapi beda. Jadi ceritanya kamu suka sama seseorang, kamu pengen deket sama dia, tapi kamu nggak mau pacaran. Jadilah orang itu sebagai cem-ceman kamu. Dan seperti hubungan yang udah dijelasin diatas, jalannya hubungan mirip-mirip sama orang pacaran.
Sebenernya main cemceman ini agak jahat sih. Kalo cemceman kamu suka itu nggak mau pacaran juga dan santai aja sih ngga apa-apa. Tapi kalo si cemceman kamu ternyata naksir juga sama kamu dan ngarepin kamu buat serius, jatohnya nanti kayak kamu cuma mainin dan ngegantungin dia.


#5 Lagi istirahat/break/rehat dsb.
Kadang-kadang buat pasangan yang udah lumayan lama pacaran dan menghadapi masalah gede, numpuk atau ada unsur-unsur prinsip, mereka biasanya suka break dulu untuk mendinginkan suasana supaya bisa mencari jalan keluar yang terbaik. Umpanya kayak kamu lagi maen game, terus udah mentok nih, kamu pause dulu, istirahat, tapi ya nanti terserah kamu mau lanjut apa enggak.

Ketika lagi break, status percintaan kamu sebenernya lagi nggak jelas. Jomblo enggak, tapi punya pacar juga enggak. Tapi biasanya, break malah digunakan buat nyari ban serep (bisa jadi cemceman), kalo-kalo hubungan yang ini udah nggak ketolong lagi. Atau, sebenernya pasangan kamu udah punya serep, tapi karena takut dibilang selingkuh, makanya dia minta break biar dia bisa bebas main-main sama si serepnya.


#6 Rumit / It's complicated
Ini dia, status ambigu yang paling megang di dunia percintaan. Sampe-sampe status ini disediakan khusus di Facebook, karena saking banyaknya orang yang lagi It's Complicated sama pasangannya.

Hubungan yang It's Complicated itu seperti apa ? Kira-kira begini: Kamu sama pasangan kamu udah 4 taun bersama. Kamu saling menyayangi, dan rela berkorban untuk masing-masing. Kalian udah kenal dan lumayan deket sama keluarga satu sama lain.
Temen-temen pada bilang kalian adalah pasangan serasi dan nyuruh cepetan kawin. Namun tiba-tiba bokap nyokapnya pasangan kamu suatu hari bilang ke dia kalo mereka sebenernya kurang sreg sama kamu. Padahal selama ini mereka sama kamu baik-baik aja. Terus pasangan kamu cerita lah sama kamu, dan hubungan kamu jadi kerasa aneh. Pasangan kamu, yang anak berbakti pada orang tua akhirnya ngalah sama keinginan bokap nyokapnya.
Akhirnya kalian pun putus. Tapi karena perasaan nggak bisa diboongin, kalian masih sering ketemu diem-diem, walaupun hubungannya udah beda. Kamu pun sedih dan curhat ke temen cewek kamu. Begitu pula pasangan kamu, dia curhat ke temennya dan salah satu temen cowoknya mengambil kesempatan karena si mantan kamu ini jomblo dan emang oke. Dan karena si cowok ini baik orangnya, mantan kamu ya seneng-seneng aja. Terus si cowok ini nembak, tapi ditolak karena mantan kamu hatinya masih buat kamu. Rumit banget kan?


Mungkin kalian pernah atau lagi ngalamin hubungan kaya di atas? atau malah statusnya lebih aneh lagi? Jujur kadang saya lebih mikir kalo jomblo itu lebih enak daripada punya pasangan tapi ambigu gitu statusnya.

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Posted in: Opini

[Masak] Nila Saos Pedas Manis

Ikannya gak keliatan, saosnya banyak binggo -_- eh mulai sekarang saya kasih watermark ya :')

Oke Blogosphere, kali ini saya nge-blog pake bahasa lagi.  Jadi ceritanya kemaren saya masak ikan nila saos pedas manis, nah kebetulan enak (enaknya cuma kebetulan -_-) jadi saya mau share deh resepnya di mari silakan di simak.

Waktu

• Persiapan 15 menit masak 40 menit = 55 Menit

Tingkat kesulitan

• 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

Bahan

• 1/2 Kg Ikan Nila
• minyak untuk menggoreng
• Tepung bumbu
• Jeruk nipis / lemon

Bahan saus

• 5 SDM saos cabai
• 5 buah cabe rawit
• 3 siung bawang putih
• 3 siung bawang merah
• 1/2 wortel
• 1 pinch garam
• 1,5 sdt gula pasir
• 1 pinch merica
• 1 sdt kaldu bubuk
• 1/2 gelas air
• 1 SDM larutan maizena

Mari masak!

Ikan

1. Bersihkan kemudian filet ikan nilanya, sisa tulangnya jangan dibuang.
2. beri air jeruk nipis diamkan sebentar (15 menit lah).
3. Gulingkan daging ikan & sisa tulang di atas tepung bumbu.
4. Goreng sampai matang coklat keemasan.

Saus

1. panaskan minyak, tumis bawang, cabe dan wortel samapi layu.
2. masukkan saus cabai dan air.
3. Setelah mendidih tambahkan garam, gula, kaldu bubuk dan merica, aduk rata.
4. tambahkan larutan maizena untuk mengentalkan sausnya.
5. setelah itu angkat dan siram saus di atas ikan goreng yang sudah ditata.

Selamat mencoba ^_^

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Posted in: Masak

Type of people that i hate on public transport

Hai! what up?

A couple months ago i wrote about some situations in people should keep their mouth shut, and one of the situation is when you're on public transportation and as a person who doesn't drive i've been using a lot of public transport and these are some kind of people that i hate (i think the rest of you gonna hate them too) in public transport.

#1 People who sit close to you even though the entire bus is empty
First person is that kind of person who for some reason always sit next to you even though the entire bus is empty, why? just why? i don't get it i mean what is wrong with these people? they can sit everywhere in this bus but they choose to sit next to me and make a creepy eye contact. This is the most awkward situation on public transport because if i willing to move to another seat it feels weird because the person you're moving away from (yes that creepy one) is might be thinking "do i smell?" or "am i look like a criminal?" and for god sake if i have a chance to say it out loud i'm gonna say "no you're not smell or looks like criminal, you're just creeps me" but it's rude, so i just sit there and pretending they're not exist.

#2 The Elbow rapist
Actually these kind people are not my problem, but i can't stand it when a girl is sexually abused in front of me, okay it is not an actual rape but slightly, so when the bus is getting crowded and this little bastard "accidentally" boob-elbowing girl next to him i'm not talking about people who accidentally boob-elbowing, i'm talking about those bastard who do that on purpose, yes i know it bitch! because the bus is sailing, the driver is not surprisingly hit the brake and for no reason your elbow just touching her boob and your face is clearly express that you're enjoying it, you know what in this situation i really really hope karma does exist and bitch you're gonna get one.

#3 "Celebrity"
Okay they're not a real celebrity but for some reason they think they're superstar who riding their limo. I don't understand these kind of people, i mean come on you're riding a goddamn bus and it's 8 in the morning but they're dress up like Syahrini meet lady GaGa, (super ultra mega over-dressed) and by far the most annoying thing they do is they're blocking other people way and not just that, they're also be like "excuse me i'm a celebrity,and you're blocking get the hell out of my way" and i'll be like "i'm sorry what? who are you?".

#4 Briefcase wankers
These kind of people never smile, and they're always in rush they will smack a child or grandma in the face with their briefcase to get in to the bus a lil bit faster, dude! you're not the only one who need to get in that bus and i promise to you, if you just calm the fuck down you still will be in that goddamn bus. You know what? i like to fuck around with these kind of people i like to blocking their way to make them late and my favorite thing in the world is when i see them running for the bus and the door slam in their face.

#5 A "pregnant lady"
It's sounds really really wrong and it looks like i'm a bad person for sayin' this but i'm not talking about 6 month prego lady who got a visible bump because that's fine they're welcome to take my seat, what i don't like is when skinny little size zero bitches in the bus demand my seat like "oh my god i'm so pregnant, can i have your seat?" Bitch! you are not pregnant, just because last night you had sex without condom it doesn't mean you're pregnant and take my seat okay. And if you think that i made it up, trust me this kind of bitch does exist in public transport.

#6 People who insist talks to you for the entire ride
As we've learned on this post one of the situation that you should shut your face is when riding a public transport.  I'm not anti social but at this point i'm not in the mood to talks to you, and even worst of that is that person continually ask you what the next stop is even though the bus has a screen and announcer that displays the next stop.

#7 Person with ridiculously loud music 
They're always playing an awful song loudly (yes they're playing their music with speaker), they're dancing away to them self, and probably lip-syncing, so basically they're the happiest person alive and everybody hates them and they will play that song no matter what, they doesn't care if the bus is on fire or plunge into the bottom of the ocean, this person will play their goddamn song.

bye

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Posted in: Opini

Irritating couples around me

Hey Blogosphere It’s me Nuhan! Are you in a relationship or you’re single or “it’s complicated”, seriously I am happy if you're dating someone, really. But if you fit into any of the categories described below, chances are that NOBODY likes you much.

#1 The Horny Social Media Couples

So these couples strives on social media to get our attention, their idea of foreplay is tweeting, or updating facebook status and it is so fucking annoying honestly! I mean making  love on my timeline? don’t you guys ever communicate in private? Or your whole relationship just on the internet, they just like

Tono: “oh yeah baby, you like that tweet?”

Tuti: “oh yeah, I’m gonna tap this favorite button for ya”

Tono: “oh…. It feels so good when you tag me! Argh….”

Tuti: “oh yes baby! Oh…. Yeah say my username! Say it! Say it! yes, oh my goodness it feels so damn good ah…”

WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU? And by far the most annoying thing that these couples does is they post pictures of them kissing each other, and I’m not talking about the pictures of your selfie with your boyfriend/girlfriend beside you and then kisses you because yes I know it’s sweet, I’m talking about picture that showing both of them are kissing, sucking each other face and neither of them are looking at the camera like “hey look at us, we exchanging our saliva #NoFilter” oh please… you know what? I wish I have a filter for my eyes so I don’t have to see you fucking porn pic, are you never understand it? Let’s be real with you okay not a single person want to see a picture of you two kissing, I promise you because it’s weird, it’s uncomfortable, it’s lame as fuck!

#2 The Stupid Cuddly Shit

So these are type of couples that gonna make the rest of us throw up, why? Because the biggest decision in their relationship is who should hang up the fucking phone first.

Joko: “you hang up fisrt babe...”

Susi: “No you hang up”

Joko: “but I want you to hang up”

Susi: “but then I’m gonna miss you”

Joko: “okay what if we hang up at the same time?”

Susi: “okay, you promise?”

Joko: “okay, one, two aw… but I want you to hang up first”

FUCK IT! Why don’t you just give me the fucking phone and I’m gonna hang it up for you! Like what the fuck I promise whoever hangs up first the other person not gonna stay behind and cheating with the operator.  And the other shitty thing that they do is when they do a baby talking to each other and they calling each other with all those ridiculous nick names like “Hey my sweet honey booboo pug angel” or “My little princess sugar butterfly poodle” and here deep down in my heart I wanna say to all those couples like “Oh hey, sorry to interrupt you but what does that even mean? Princess sugar butterfly puddle??? That’s not cute, that’s a lab experiment gone wrong!” I mean can you imagine what a “princess sugar butterfly puddle” looks like? It that cute? Is that how you describing your girlfriend? (Yucks!)

#3 The Siamese Twins

So these two of people are just join up the hip because they go everywhere together and often times one of them is not welcome, for example is when a guy bring his girlfriend to hang out with his buddy because we’re gonna spend the night playing bunch of games, do a farts festival, telling a sex jokes or maybe surfing RedTube. You know what? How the fuck am I supposed to fart freely and tell you about sex jokes when you brought your girlfriend here??? or a girl who bring her boyfriend to a girls night, because you know what’s gonna happen right? Your friend gonna be like “Why the fuck boys are so fucking dumb?” and you are gonna be like “whoa… but not my little sugar butterfly puddle” (yuck!) and she gonna punch you two in the face! i mean TAKE A BREAK! You guys shit together like one person sit and one other person stand beside the toilet and wiping each other ass? Do you pee together? I don’t get it because girls has to sit while taking pee and guys has to stand, do you do like a yoga pose so you both can take a pee at the same time? How does it work???

#4 The Freaking Smeegles

These are the anti-social couples who sits in the corner at social gathering, like everyone else are eating on this table and they are right there on their own private table, everyone are on the dance floor together having a great time, and they over there slow dancing with “Turn Down For What” plays in the background, because the rest of us are laughing, drinking, playing board games having a good time, making friends, meeting new people, then there’s a you two chilling in the corner.  Honestly why the fuck are you here? if I can replace you with 2 mannequin and I prefer having 2 mannequin because at least I can take a selfie with 2 mannequin! You SUCK AS FUCK! Okay….

And the last but not least

#5 The “not couple” Couple

This is the couple who “not on relationship”, they’re always together but they always say that they’re not on relationship, I mean they’re making uot in public, they’re watching movie together, they’re having sex but they’re keep saying “we’re not dating” shoo shoo shoo shoo let me tell you that everyone knows that you are couple okay… and can I tell you a little secret? NOBODY CARE ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP STATUS! So you don’t need to hide it like:

Me: “are you dating her?”

Bejo: “What? Dating her? Pffttt no, we’re not dating”

Me: “but you wearing a promise ring”

Bejo: “What? No dude! Ya know I’m a player yo!”

Me: “but it looks like she wearing the matching one”

Bejo: “What? No it’s just a coincidence”

Me: “I know yo’re dating”

 Bejo: “What? No dude! You know me dude…”

I mean who the fuck you are huh? I don’t care about your relationship tho.

So okay guys that’s it…. I hope you’re not fit into one of these type of couple, and if you find a couple who fit into those categories then don’t give a fuck with them, I know they’re fucking annoying but just don’t give a fuck.

-bye-

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Posted in: Terserah Penulis

Times in which people should shut the f**k up!

What’s up you guys!  So before you start reading this post let me just tell you THAT I LOVE PEOPLE!, I LOVE MAKING FRIENDS, I LOVE MEETING NEW FACES, I LOVE BEING SOCIAL ETC. But…..!!! There’s a time that I don’t want to talk to people.  In my brain these situation are like common sense but apparently “common sense” ain’t so common these days So if you don't agree with me, just pipe down.  Here’s the some situation that people should shut up.

#1 WHEN I PUT MY HEADPHONES

When I put my headphones on, it’s like international sign to “Please don’t interrupt my favorite song, and don’t talk to me” but it’s like they don’t get it they know that i’m wearing my headphones, they know that I can’t hear them but they choose to start the conversation, as far as I’m concern wglitter headphones is like wearing “do not disturb sign” YOU HAVE TO RESPECTING THE SIGN GUYS! And you can’t even pretending that you don’t seeing my headphones because these days headphones be looking like giant shit on my ears. And i'm sorry i'm not in the mood to playing charades with you.  And the worst part is when I takes my headphones out and my face clearly express that you’re annoying then I put them back in and that person talks again, what the fuck? Just what the fuck…? In my opinion the only person that allowed to interrupt my music is a pilot on a plane telling me about turbulence, are you a pilot? Are you a turbulence? Are you the safety demonstration video? No? then shut your face!

#2 WHEN I’M IN THE TAXI

Actually I feel like I’m a terrible person for saying this, but I cannot stand when my taxi driver insist talking to me for the entire ride, because I’m in the back seat texting, tweeting, taking some selfies, daydreaming, and listen to my favorite music (like I said in #1), closing my eyes and you in the driver seat try to interview me?.  If you’re taxi driver or your parent is taxi driver don’t be offended, I mean don’t get me wrong I get it, it’s very sweet when they asking about me, asking about my day but the reality of the situation is I would probably go to a party and I’m gonna be forced to be social, meeting new people etc. and I have a thing that I call “the social box” it’s like “laugh box” from SpongeBob Squarepants, I have very very limited amount of “social glitter” in my “social box” so if I use all of my social glitters to talking to taxi driver and I’m get to that party and slap every fucking strangers that approaches me because I have no more social glitter.  DON’T EMPTY MY GODDAMN BOX GUYS! And I promise I’ll give you a good tip if you just shut up.

#3 WHEN DENTIST DOING MY TEETH

It’s boggle my mind that dentists have a such impressive degrees but totally lack of social skill in this situation.  Like they literally sucking the saliva out of my mouth, they are drilling my gum and I can see my blood in the little tubey thing leaving my mouth.  Basically my mouth is looking like goddamn construction sites and they can’t stop asking about stupid question like “Nuhan, how’s your college going?”, “what major do you take?”, “are your parents still together?” and I’m just like “awgehermagerhrdhsad…..” like how many things you want me to do right now? You know what? why don’t you just put a clarinet in my mouth as well I’ll play you a song while you doing my teeth or give me some balloons and I’ll blew them up and have a party.

#4 WHEN I’M IN THE PLANE / TRAIN / BUS

So let me get straight right? I’m sitting on the shitty economy class seat for next 4 hours, sharing a washroom with tons of people and you want me to be social on this plane? No! no, no, no, no! I’m sorry but people who talk to me in the airplane (or train, or coaches… whatever) I ain’t about that! I am not trying to be a social for these many hours, because if you want to talk to me for this entire flight please tell me, just tell me… so I can jump out the window into and just swim for the rest of the fucking way.  I would rather be on the small boat with a tiger and rename myself to “Pi” than be able to talk to you, because let me tell you what I want to be doing I wanna put my headphones in (as we’ve learned at the situation #1 that’s the indication to not talk to me), I want enjoying my shitty seat, I want reading some books (okay JK! I hate reading).

#5 WHEN I’M IN THE MOVIE THEATER

So we watching this movie right? And my annoying friend feels to need to discuss everything happening in the movie! And let me made one thing very clear okay? I AM NOT THE FUCKING DIRECTOR, I AM NOT THE GODDAMN SCREEN WRITER, I’M NOT IN THE MOVIE and if you confuse about something happening on the screen just remember I watching the same screen and I have no goddamn script, and you just like “hey why the hell they kill that guy?”, “is that girl from *insert movie here*?”, “OMG that’s totally happened to me last year” etc. etc. etc. and I promise THIS PERSON IS GONNA LOSE THEIR POPCORN SHARING PRIVILEGES WITH ME! And you know my popcorn be layered with butter and taste DELICIOUS.

I’m sure that you have ever had any of these situation so don’t get me wrong I don’t have social anxiety, I LOVE PEOPLE!, I LOVE MAKING FRIENDS, I LOVE MEETING NEW FACES, I LOVE BEING SOCIAL (like I said above).  I hope you like it if you did please share this with you friends in your social media. ^_^

Bye!

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Posted in: Opini

The magnificence of Angkringan

Hey wassup you guys! For those of you who have visited Yogyakarta or you live there you must be familiar with food vendors they call "angkringan". It is a traditional street food sellers in Yogyakarta who brought their food in a wooden wagon, they sell their food in the street (mostly at night). Angkringan is based on a Javanese word "angkring" which means sitting. You can recognize it with the long benches arranged around the Wagon. Usually it has plastic tarpaulin covering it's top.
So why are they so special? Here's why!

1. The prices.  You will never find other food vendors in the whole fucking world who sell their food with cheap price like angkringan. You can eat many food as you want till your stomach explode with just $1! YES! just 1 fucking dollar. It's cheaper than a pack of generic condom.

2. The menu. There's a bunch of food such as Nasi kucing (literally means "cat rice") because it served with small portions like a cat food, and there's a quail eggs satay, chicken satay, fried tempeh, fried tofu etc. And they also sell beverages like coffee, tea, wedang jahe (hot ginger) etc.

3. The seller. A friendly seller make their customers feel at home in their stall, you can spend a couple hour for drinking a cup of tea.

4. Everyone eat there.  Student eat there, local tourists eat there, foreign tourists eat there, celebrity eat there,  artist eat there , doctor eat there, professor eat there, the guy from korean boyband eat there, honey boo-boo's mother eat there, jehovah's witnesses eat there (JK lol)

So the conclusion is I LOVE ANGKRINGAN! everyone loves it! Everybody needs it! Angkringan is kindness, simplicity, friendliness of Javanese culture.

Okay guys hope you enjoy reading this, and I'm sorry if this post is lil bit messed bc I'm blogging with my phone. Bye...

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Posted in: Opini,Terserah Penulis

That feeling, ohhh...........

Hey whassup Blogosphere! i'm back! okay so today i made a list about simple things that can make you happy, and if you notice that this is my very first blog i wrote in english. Well i don't speak english so if you found some fucked up words, pleaseee don't be a grammar police ;). And back to the business... So okay guys have you ever had "slap me in the face" feeling? if you had a unimaginable good feeling that you thought you were dreaming and then you want someone to slap you in the face to make sure that you were not dreaming, so basically that feeling happens when you had an exciting thing, but it also happens in a simple things that you can find in daily routine. I've made a list about simple thing that makes you happy and of course it will make you say "slap me in the face!".

#1 

When you wake up in the morning that seems like you missed the alarm and you look at it and then you realize it's actually you wake up before the alarm is ringing and you still got a couple hour left to go back to sleep. It's just great, it's just the best thing in the whole fuckin' world!

#2

If you driving a vehicle and you found out that all the traffic light are green (yassss all of them) you just get to keep going you don't have to stop it's amazing!

#3

When you pulling on a brand new pair of underwear, hmmm.... there's seriously something about opening a pack of new undies, pulling a pair out and then putting it on after a fresh bath. The best part is something about knowing that no gross, no yucky, no one ever touched them before.

#4

When you're on the Twitter and you have a notification from someone that you like a lot (perhaps your crush) favorited your fucking tweet and you just like "Oh my sweet merciful Lord!!! is this the real life? is this just fantasy....???". 

#5

When you order someting in a restaurant and you waiting it and OH MY GOODNESS! it came early! (okay it sounds really dirty when i type it came early, you know what i mean).

#6

When you buy something online and the package delivered earlier than the schedule, seriously it's very rare thing, if you had one you must have been lucky and you just like "oh my God it's just amazing my brand new hi-tech sex toy is finally delivered".

#7

When you pull a fresh blanket out of the dryer and immediately put it on hmmm.... it called the blanket of happiness, it's so cuddle-able and... it's so fluffy!!!! (read it with the impression of Agnes from Despicable Me).

#8

When you having a "Mighty Sneeze" ouuhhh..... there's nobody in there, and you don't worry about holding it back, and you sneeze the biggest sneeze you ever have in your entire fucking life! O-H M-Y G-O-D that feels so good.

#9

When there's nobody in your home and you take a pee with opened bathroom door, and yeah you don't have to worry about your weenie sneaking out because no one home bitches!!!

#10

When you found money in your pocket, it doesn't matter how rich or how poor you are, finding money in your pocket that you long forgot was there just feels awesome! it's like free money that you can spend on anyting you want and not feel the sightest bit guilty about it.

#11

When you crack a joke and then someone laughing hysterically at it, i don't know how it's feel for you guys but i like cracking jokes and getting laughs is great feeling, and it gets better when someone laughing hysterically,  and have lost ability to control it, that is THE BEST FEELING!

#12

(This is my favorite) When someone scratching your impossible to reach itch. There are those one itches that never seem to be scracthable by your own fingers / toes even though you've been try to use chop stick or coat hanger but the itch doesn't go away until someone else come and stracthes it for you. "OMG you're my savior".





Okay guys that is my list of few simple things that makes you (or me) happy, i hope you enjoyed it and if you did please share this on twitter/facebook/etc. And again i'm sorry if my words were fucked up.

-bye-

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Posted in: Terserah Penulis

Alasan orang menekan tombol "Favorite" di twitter

Halo Blogosphere! Kayaknya saya udah lama nggak nulis, terakhir bikin tulisan bulan kmren bikin resep doang.  So hari ini saya mau ngasih tau beberapa alesan orang mengklik/tap tombol favorite di Twitter, secara fitrahnya (yaelah) tombol favorite dipake kalo kamu suka / setuju sama tweet seseorang, tapi nyatanya banyak banget alesan dibalik sesorang menekan tombol "Favorite", apa aja??? les cek it ot!


1. "Oh i see you bitch!" favorite
Favorite jenis ini biasanya banyak dipake sama cewek (kadang cowok juga) kalo ada tweet yang isinya sindiran, maksud dari favorite ini adalah ngasih tau sang pengirim tweet kalo dia tau tweet itu nyindir dia.
contoh:
Wati *nge-tweet*: "dasar cewek murahan!"
Siti *dalem hati*: "gua ngerti kalo lu nyindir gua, nih makan!" *teken tombol favorite*

2."Wasalam" favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake buat mengakhiri percakapan (bales-balesan mention) karena kamu udah bosen ngobrol sama dia, jadi dibanding ngomong langsung kalo kamu udah bosen kamu lebih memilih memberikan "kode" buat mengakhiri percakapan tersbut (mungkin sejenis sopan santun di tweetland).
contoh:
budi *nge-tweet*: @wati: gak bisa bobok nih
wati *nge-tweet*: @budi: terus?
budi *nge-tweet*: @wati: ngobrol aja yuk
wati: *teken tombol favorite*

3. "Sukurin / karma bitch!" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake kalo kamu liat orang yang nggak kamu suka dapet musibah, jadi favorite jenis ini semacem rasa sukur kita kehadirat Tuhan YME (eh) karena orang yang nggak mau suka dapet berita buruk / musibah.
contoh:
Toni *nge-tweet*: "anjrit, udah ban bocor ujan pula aaahhh kampret!"Budi *dalem hati*: "rasain lu nyet!" *teken tombol favorite*

4. "No thanks" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake kalo kamu dapet mention yang isinya "aneh" tapi kamu gak tega buat balesnya.
contoh:
Toni *nge-tweet*: "@wati can i see your tit-pic please..."Wati: *teken tombol favorite*

5. "MuPeng" Favorite (my favorite!!!)
Biasanya dipake sama orang yang lagi nyari perharian jadi dia nge-tweet apa pun pasti di favorite sama dia.
contoh:
Siti *nge-tweet*: "ya ampun lucu banget"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*
Siti *nge-tweet*: "lagi makan #mieayam"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*
Siti *nge-tweet*: "ya ampun hijab gua nyagkut di pohon"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*

6. "Genuine" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini sudah amat sanagat sangat sangaaaatttt susah ditemuin, mungkin dari sekian banyak jenis favorite favorite jenis ini yang paling langka, favorite tipe ini dipake kalo kamu nemuin postingan yang bener2 kamu suka dari lubuk hati yang paliiiiiing dalam, contohnya: Scarlett Johansson posted nudes! *teken tombol favorite*, 1D bubar!!! *teken tombol favorite*, cewek/cowok yg kamu suka barusan putus *teken tombol favorite*




Oke sekian Blog kali ini see ya!

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Posted in: Terserah Penulis