Tuesday, August 26, 2014

That feeling, ohhh...........







Hey whassup Blogosphere! i'm back! okay so today i made a list about simple things that can make you happy, and if you notice that this is my very first blog i wrote in english. Well i don't speak english so if you found some fucked up words, pleaseee don't be a grammar police ;). And back to the business... So okay guys have you ever had "slap me in the face" feeling? if you had a unimaginable good feeling that you thought you were dreaming and then you want someone to slap you in the face to make sure that you were not dreaming, so basically that feeling happens when you had an exciting thing, but it also happens in a simple things that you can find in daily routine. I've made a list about simple thing that makes you happy and of course it will make you say "slap me in the face!".



#1 

When you wake up in the morning that seems like you missed the alarm and you look at it and then you realize it's actually you wake up before the alarm is ringing and you still got a couple hour left to go back to sleep. It's just great, it's just the best thing in the whole fuckin' world!




#2
If you driving a vehicle and you found out that all the traffic light are green (yassss all of them) you just get to keep going you don't have to stop it's amazing!



#3
When you pulling on a brand new pair of underwear, hmmm.... there's seriously something about opening a pack of new undies, pulling a pair out and then putting it on after a fresh bath. The best part is something about knowing that no gross, no yucky, no one ever touched them before.



#4
When you're on the Twitter and you have a notification from someone that you like a lot (perhaps your crush) favorited your fucking tweet and you just like "Oh my sweet merciful Lord!!! is this the real life? is this just fantasy....???". 




#5

When you order someting in a restaurant and you waiting it and OH MY GOODNESS! it came early! (okay it sounds really dirty when i type it came early, you know what i mean).




#6

When you buy something online and the package delivered earlier than the schedule, seriously it's very rare thing, if you had one you must have been lucky and you just like "oh my God it's just amazing my brand new hi-tech sex toy is finally delivered".



#7

When you pull a fresh blanket out of the dryer and immediately put it on hmmm.... it called the blanket of happiness, it's so cuddle-able and... it's so fluffy!!!! (read it with the impression of Agnes from Despicable Me).



#8
When you having a "Mighty Sneeze" ouuhhh..... there's nobody in there, and you don't worry about holding it back, and you sneeze the biggest sneeze you ever have in your entire fucking life! O-H M-Y G-O-D that feels so good.



#9
When there's nobody in your home and you take a pee with opened bathroom door, and yeah you don't have to worry about your weenie sneaking out because no one home bitches!!!



#10
When you found money in your pocket, it doesn't matter how rich or how poor you are, finding money in your pocket that you long forgot was there just feels awesome! it's like free money that you can spend on anyting you want and not feel the sightest bit guilty about it.



#11
When you crack a joke and then someone laughing hysterically at it, i don't know how it's feel for you guys but i like cracking jokes and getting laughs is great feeling, and it gets better when someone laughing hysterically,  and have lost ability to control it, that is THE BEST FEELING!



#12
(This is my favorite) When someone scratching your impossible to reach itch. There are those one itches that never seem to be scracthable by your own fingers / toes even though you've been try to use chop stick or coat hanger but the itch doesn't go away until someone else come and stracthes it for you. "OMG you're my savior".





Okay guys that is my list of few simple things that makes you (or me) happy, i hope you enjoyed it and if you did please share this on twitter/facebook/etc. And again i'm sorry if my words were fucked up.

-bye-

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Alasan orang menekan tombol "Favorite" di twitter






Halo Blogosphere! Kayaknya saya udah lama nggak nulis, terakhir bikin tulisan bulan kmren bikin resep doang.  So hari ini saya mau ngasih tau beberapa alesan orang mengklik/tap tombol favorite di Twitter, secara fitrahnya (yaelah) tombol favorite dipake kalo kamu suka / setuju sama tweet seseorang, tapi nyatanya banyak banget alesan dibalik sesorang menekan tombol "Favorite", apa aja??? les cek it ot!


1. "Oh i see you bitch!" favorite
Favorite jenis ini biasanya banyak dipake sama cewek (kadang cowok juga) kalo ada tweet yang isinya sindiran, maksud dari favorite ini adalah ngasih tau sang pengirim tweet kalo dia tau tweet itu nyindir dia.
contoh:
Wati *nge-tweet*: "dasar cewek murahan!"
Siti *dalem hati*: "gua ngerti kalo lu nyindir gua, nih makan!" *teken tombol favorite*


2."Wasalam" favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake buat mengakhiri percakapan (bales-balesan mention) karena kamu udah bosen ngobrol sama dia, jadi dibanding ngomong langsung kalo kamu udah bosen kamu lebih memilih memberikan "kode" buat mengakhiri percakapan tersbut (mungkin sejenis sopan santun di tweetland).
contoh:
budi *nge-tweet*: @wati: gak bisa bobok nih
wati *nge-tweet*: @budi: terus?
budi *nge-tweet*: @wati: ngobrol aja yuk
wati: *teken tombol favorite*

3. "Sukurin / karma bitch!" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake kalo kamu liat orang yang nggak kamu suka dapet musibah, jadi favorite jenis ini semacem rasa sukur kita kehadirat Tuhan YME (eh) karena orang yang nggak mau suka dapet berita buruk / musibah.
contoh:
Toni *nge-tweet*: "anjrit, udah ban bocor ujan pula aaahhh kampret!"Budi *dalem hati*: "rasain lu nyet!" *teken tombol favorite*

4. "No thanks" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini bisanya dipake kalo kamu dapet mention yang isinya "aneh" tapi kamu gak tega buat balesnya.
contoh:
Toni *nge-tweet*: "@wati can i see your tit-pic please..."Wati: *teken tombol favorite*

5. "MuPeng" Favorite (my favorite!!!)
Biasanya dipake sama orang yang lagi nyari perharian jadi dia nge-tweet apa pun pasti di favorite sama dia.
contoh:
Siti *nge-tweet*: "ya ampun lucu banget"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*
Siti *nge-tweet*: "lagi makan #mieayam"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*
Siti *nge-tweet*: "ya ampun hijab gua nyagkut di pohon"Paijo: *teken tombol favorite*

6. "Genuine" Favorite
Favorite jenis ini sudah amat sanagat sangat sangaaaatttt susah ditemuin, mungkin dari sekian banyak jenis favorite favorite jenis ini yang paling langka, favorite tipe ini dipake kalo kamu nemuin postingan yang bener2 kamu suka dari lubuk hati yang paliiiiiing dalam, contohnya: Scarlett Johansson posted nudes! *teken tombol favorite*, 1D bubar!!! *teken tombol favorite*, cewek/cowok yg kamu suka barusan putus *teken tombol favorite*




Oke sekian Blog kali ini see ya!

 
PERINGATAN! Blog ini milik Nuhan Hidayat, bagi yang copas artikel sembarangan yang cowok tak sumpahin tit*tnya impoten seumur hidup, yang cewek tak sumpahin jadi perawan sampe mati.